I can no longer multi-task like I was once able to.

Right now, I’m sitting on my sofa, vicariously watching my husband conduct business over the phone in our living room.  It makes me exhausted.  I used to juggle so many things at once just last year and I’m nowhere close to being equipped to doing it anymore.  It’s not passive-aggressiveness, I just don’t have the energy to do it.

So why am I about to embark upon a journey of brining back my resume writing company?  Why?  Because I cannot help that I have an obsessive entrepreneurial itch.  Don’t you judge me.

I’ll probably give up on it within 3 months.  Eh.

It’s changes I wasn’t expecting…for whatever reason.  I…oops, I have to go.  It’s almost time for me to go to bed.

No, I do NOT have a bedtime.  I have a preferred sleep time.

I did not think that coming back to this blog would be so difficult for me.  You know, as derogatory as I am capable of being, my Mama used to be highly entertained by my blog.

That’s why when she unexpectedly passed away…*sighs*…

So, Mama, this is for you.  Like you, writing is my solitude.  And I’ve been away the entire 6 months you’ve been gone.

So, welcome me back, y’all.  I have so much to say.

I haven't even SEEN the disc case since it moved in with us this past Thursday.

“We” bought NBA 2k11 just a few days ago and “we” have been playing it ever since.  Hours have been devoted to “our” playing of this game on our xBox 360.

“We” like the game, but I sure could go for The Husband not getting so hype that the xBox controller is at risk…for, *shrugs* I dunno…flying through our big-a** flat screen T.V.  I’m just sayin’…

What is it about video games and the potential they have to get us friggin’ hooked?!  This one’s not going back to Gamestop, it’s here to stay, damnit.  I shall not complain too much…Call of Duty: Black Ops will be out soon and we’ll be fighting to use the game console then, lol!

YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAH BOY! SHOOT 'EM UP TIME ON 11.10.10 BEEYOCHES! MUTHA-F***** WAR PAINT ON THE FACE AND S***...COSTUMES! (All of that, but not really, but for real. With enthusiam.)

That was a gangsta haiku, in case ya didn’t know…

We’ve only got two more of those kind of same month/day/year combos left in our lifetimes, folks.  Sounds…morbid…lol!

ANYWHO, I’m stopping by to share that there’s only 23 days left to make a donation toward the development of my book!  You can check out the link here, and $1 is helpful, so don’t feel like you have to do the suggested contributions.

Also, a friend sent me a text message today asking if sending a check or money order is cool.  Absolutely!  Below is the proper info about doing that.  Look, I don’t want anyone under the impression I’m using these contributions to pay my bills or go on vacation, so I’m glad IndieGoGo has things all covered.

Want to send a check?

Send it payable to IndieGoGo at:
PO Box 590809
San Francisco, CA 94159
Please include your name, email address, mailing address, project title and project id (Uh…Duh: This is Part I, Right? / 8841) with your check.

ENJOY YOUR SUNDAY!

"Same somethin' 'bout my midsection and I'll cut you!" I feel ya, girl...word.

Yes, I talked mad crap about her marriage during its first week, but I LOVE how blunt she is!  I mean, I’m capable of being hardcore bitchy and/or painfully blunt, so I dig her.  She’s not evil…she’s the shit, lol!

Now…on to this rant…

I’m not an athlete.  I’ve been rather physically active for a good portion of my life, and Lord knows I’ve done my share of walking my first year out in helLA.  In fact, all that walking, and my flat feet, have brought to my life plantar fascitis and heel spurs.  YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY for THAT!

It was either a technical photo, or a pic of me crying.

So, I’m propped up in bed, sans pain killers for the time being, and The Husband calls and tells me that some stupid teens launched a damn rock at our car and dented it right above one of the headlights.  WTF!?!  What do I have to do to get a damn break, dude…what…

I feel helpless, not being able to move.  Now our car has an additional boo-boo and for what?  It’s all cow dung, dog it.  (Yes, I know there’s curse words in here, and I’m trying not to curse, but it’s taking some time to fix the habit.  Bite me.)

Anywho, I found a pretty cool use for Yelp today while waiting for the congestion in my head to break up a bit: traveling!  As I sat with my netbook and hopped from one Los Angeles location review to the next, I felt like I did a tour of the city for free. 

I AM A TIME TRAVELER!  OR…SOMETHING SIMILAR TO A TIME TRAVELER…OR NOT…?

I now know which theatre to check out, where to go for a great margarita, and which spa should be avoided at all cost.  Unless fungus and ringworm does something for ya…*gags*

So, hop on Yelp, pick your city (or scroll to the bottom of the site and select a random city.  Hey, Houston and Detroit! *Blows kiss*) and crack up at some of the reviews. 

P.S.  Zagat isn’t half bad either!

Best Friend texted a few days ago that when it comes to me and penny pinching, she takes notes.  I was a little flattered, especially knowing that just 4 years ago I was nowhere close to being financially responsible.  I still have things I’d like to change, therefore this campaign is a great opportunity for me to hit the nail on the head.

First thing on the list?  My love for movies.  Growing up, movies were a big deal in my family.  And when I was single and living on my own, I could be found at a movie theater roughly 4 times a week.  LOVED going to the movies!  And then I moved to Los Angeles…and tickets out here cost an arm and a leg.  Or at least a tank of gas. 

LIFE DECISIONS, DUDE. (I couldn't find a pic that reflected a life decision well enough, so take what I give you and smile.)

Yeah, let’s go with that.

Anywho.

The Husband and I will be going through all the DVDs at our local library to fight the flick itch (LOL!  I love it!  Using that from here on out.) and then we’re moving on to THE main branch.

Yeeeeeeah! All those steps!

*Note to self…resize the pictures BEFORE uploading them and realizing they’re really big.

So, yesterday we watched “A Beautiful Mind” and The Husband learned of the magic that is paranoid schizophrenia.  And today, I was glued to the Sony flat-screen-big-screen (Yeah, cuz we’ve got one of those.  Who doesn’t?!) watching “Daybreakers” moments before “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” popped on FX.  WOOOT!  Great stuff!

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to stop my husband from rocking in his work desk chair.  It squeaks like a bed…friggin’ awful.

As I sit in front of the mirrored doors of our itty-bitty closet and type on my itty-bitty pink Dell Inspiron mini netbook, my not so itty-bitty boobs are distracting me.  Ladies and gents, let’s take a moment to talk about breasts.

I wear an understandably shocking letter and number size on a frame that still has not caught up with the eye-popping stares my chest receives.  It all happened when I left for summer vacation in 7th grade in June a small B-cup, and came back two months later a sneeze away from being thrusted into a D-cup.

Mind you, I was wearing a size 1 in clothing. 

I was never a headache for my parents with how I dress (unless you want to talk about my bohemian tendencies, and willingness to pair stripes with polka dots), but everything they bought for me, or I bought for myself, from that point on, turned into a test on what could conceal my tubular boobulars.

It got so noticeably bad at one point that a classmate hollered out “titties” at me during a school assembly that had me holding the letter ‘T” on poster board to help spell out “study” or something.  Hell, I can’t remember the word we were on stage spelling, but I do remember hearing “titties” over a silent auditorium, and then the laughter.

No, "T" is NOT for titties, damnit!

My nickname, Blink, evolved into Blinkers with a lot of guys after that day, lol!

Nonetheless, I’ve found ways to deal with them over the years.  I used to tell my Mama I wanted a reduction, but she said that God made me this way and it’s how I’m supposed to be.  She wanted answers, though, a few months back when these suckers grew another three sizes again.  Puberty’s been long done.

Breast cancer awareness month is upon us, so you’ll probably hear about boobies again, so let’s just call this a head’s up…love your boobs, folks, and check that your headlights are off!

It’s an Exclusive!  First look lyrics at one of the tracks from the much anticipated hip-hop album, I Signed Up for THIS S***?! (Shout out to Chart Vision artist Lack of Flaws for ruthlessly contributing to the craftmanship of the chorus…OMGosh…Detroit, stand up, lol!)

Chorus

She ain’t cooked s***!/She ain’t cooked s***!/I hit the door and this b****/She ain’t cook s***!/She ain’t cooked s***!/She ain’t cooked s***!/My nigga, dog, man this b****/She ain’t cook s***!

Verse 1

Get home around 5/Or 6 if traffic’s bad/Pull up to the crib/And all I smell is old trash/Ain’t no sweet aromas/Movin’ through the air/Look in the kitchen/And there’s nothing there/And she just stares/I walk up to my girl/Ask where dinner at/Nigga please she says/Grab that Digiorno’s box/Don’t make requests/Don’t even get me started/Tried to make yo a** macarroni/Couldn’t boil water!

Chorus

She ain’t cooked s***! (Damn!)/She ain’t cooked s***! (What?)/I hit the door and this b****/She ain’t cook s***! (Man!)/She ain’t cooked s***! (Been at home all day…)/She ain’t cooked s***!/My nigga, dog, man this b****/She ain’t cook s***!

Verse 2

Wake up on Saturday/To screaming smoke detectors/Baby girl got a knife stuck in the little toaster/I tried to clear the air/I say I tried to help/She just bitched me out/Go make breakfast for ya’self/Left for 8 hours/Got home a lil’ late/She shouted/What you gettin’ mad for?/I thought by now you would’ve ate!/Slapped my hand away/From her Ruffles bag/I was understanding first/Now I’m gettin’ mad

Chorus

She ain’t cooked s***! (Word…)/She ain’t cooked s***!/I hit the door and this b****/She ain’t cook s***! (Gather your shit…)/She ain’t cooked s***!/She ain’t cooked s***! (You know what?)/My nigga, dog, man this b****/She ain’t cook s***! (You got to go! )

I’m tired of this bulls***…sing ’til fade

Summer’s over in the U.S. (unless ya live on the West Coast or the South!) and it means back-to-school and back-to-work duldrums for most of us.  I’m not exempt, but the fall means book development!

I set this goal months ago that November would be the time for me to release two books, but with me being a multi-genre author, I don’t know how the hell I’ll pull it off.  January 2011 is the absolute deadline, so I guess now I have to get rolling with the plans, huh?

Well, this is where YOU come in!  Over 1500 people have read my blog (which makes me wonder what’s wrong with you people!?) and there are some clear favorites in terms of blog entries.  So, what entry do YOU want to see in the upcoming book, “Uh…Duh: This is Part I, right?”

I look forward to the responses!